So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
I just took a shit with a lightsaber in my hand. Dreams fulfilled.
While I faked being asleep, he literally prayed to God out loud, asking for forgiveness for losing his virginity before marriage.
Im deleting that text because its a possible ncaa violation
I want him to rain dance my fallopian tubes.
And I just had to awkwardly tell 3 police officers that I was having sex and not in any trouble
What's it called where you go to the stripclub with two guys that have both gone down on you...
Tuesday
Idk. It's not appealing to me. Like don't get me wrong, I love ur dick A LOT but I don't want to stare at it on an iPhone screen
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
My dad made a joke about you sending me strippers for valentine's day so clearly everything here is normal
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
I slept on her porch...in her dads handcuffs
I didn't even know his name until he texted me the next day and told me I should take a plan B pill. Thanks Danny.
Shame - the story of my life.
I'm a freaking penguin. one mate for life, and really awkward at parties
Randomize
