I should have known there'd be issues when he included "beautiful soul" in our playlist
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
i just put a booger in my mom's hair and i just needed to tell someone.
I left my toothbrush at her house. This is getting way too serious for me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my debit card account is gonna say movie, movie, ice cream, movie, cheese fries, get a fucking life, movie
I'm too hungover to crawl to the fridge so im eating the candy nipple tassels I got bought for Christmas
Oh jesus...leave it to you to hit on not one but two guys who can't fuck you till marriage.
I'm the man of the house if we're referring to livers.
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm never going out with the ashleys again. it was whoreible. terrifyingly whoreible.
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
In case you're wondering... Yes walmart will judge you for buying vodka and pickles at 645am.
That's why we have robots to masturbate for us
1 why did you tell them where i peed last night and 2 where the fuck are you
Im sober enough to understand what people are saying but drunk enough to understand its hilarious
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