....ANDDD I just became confused during sexting and sent my mother a text describing a "porno-worthy cum shot."
He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
I wish costco sold astroglide.
i wish my brain was less awake, and didn't try and picture what you were talking about.
college drinking is stealing all my money, thank god planned parenthood is somewhat free
found used condoms and an omlet in my uggs. I'm disgusted but not surprised.
My dry heaving is complicating my ability to speak.
I would have thought, as two of my best friends, you girls could have cought me as I fell out of the shower. There are so many bruises.
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
Basically I will actually need a reindeer pulled sleigh to make it to all the penises in one night.
I got her number but I don't think I'll be able to smash, I was pretending to be British AND I forgot her name
Him showing up yesterday was like a giant ego stroke for my vagina.
bitch dont make me pour hotsauce in your vagina
I don't know what she did to me last night, but the scratches on my back indicate that I had sex with a Bengal tiger last night.
Best news I’ve heard all day. Cookies and dick. What more could a girl ask for?
Right before he dumped me... he got a really ugly pair of pants. They were twill pants. A pinkish color. When I'm sad... I picture him in them. It makes me smile.
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