What's wrong?
Long week. Sore muscles. Bad back. Hangover. Mini-keg. Crazy ex-wife. Unavailable love-interest. Dead celebrity families. Republicans.
Pussy.
i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
Just got a citation from campus security for an "accordion disturbance."
I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
He was going down on me as I discovered a spaghetti-O on my boob. Its been a while since I faked it.
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
He titled his birthday party on facebook, "BJ's in PJ's- an adult slumber party." I'm the only one invited.
I cannot even describe to you the most amazing ass I have ever had the pleasure of seeing walk up the stairs in front of me just now.
If the world ends now I want you to know I was on my favorite toilet fighting the good fight.
If it goes near your penis, it should not go near the Hawks.
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
I just did shots of fireball with my dad in a car wash. How's your pregaming going?
I am literally watching TV with sunglasses on because the brightness hurts my hangover
Just fell down the stairs..might wanna call the ambulance jus take the weed out of my pocket be4 they come..
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
Randomize
