i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings
I hooked up with a Michael Jackson impersonator last night. Too soon?
so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I sometimes forget that turkeys are alive even when its not Thanksgiving.
every facebook tagged picture of yours, you are either drinking, swimming or drunk in water
I fingered her though her window because she couldn't leave
I posted my balls on ericas instagram. It got 17 likes.
You got into a heated argument about Frankenstein's intelligence while double fisting burritos from taco bell.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
People around me are just doing lines of cocaine. Like its no big deal. And I'm just here like.... Y'all want some cheezits?
Sex and sushi don't even sound good right now... I might be on my death bed. To my Liz, I leave my extensive movie collection and my drinking supplies. To Olive I leave my car. Cause every Scottish terrier needs a 2010 Camaro.
Its my nipple ring piercing anniversary. We need to celebrate.
Why does my nose taste spicy?
How do you know what your nose tastes like?
You can come over but I have to warn you that it is naked Sunday.
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
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