Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
i was picked up off the floor by a stripper, if thats not a new life low then i dont know what is.
failed my one goal of the day: wake up before 2 pm.
Then they all walked away with the drinks I bought them, and the fat one slapped me in the face. I left and my car had been towed. Worst night ever.
Very hungover, bought a newspaper and found my shorts from last night in the machine.
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
Breaking into his house to steal the sheets I'd drunk pissed on before he got home was not how I wanted to be spending spring break
I found an inside smoking lounge. I'll be here for the next 4 hours. A nice old Canadian lady has befriended me and let me use her lighter. Fuck Hartsfield-Jackson AND this layover. I win.
no need to worry, I have the internet and a cape, I can accomplish anything. nothing can go wrong, I am unstoppable. Yo.
Woke up eating a pickle on the bathroom floor this morning in some random guys sweat pants.
We should try to put a bagel on your penis
Just looked at my bank statement. 9 out of 10 transactions on the first page were from 9 different bars. The 10th was for birth control pills at the pharmacy. I need to rethink my lifestyle.
I'm sorry, but the bed has won this battle. I got up, changed my shirt, combed my hair, put on some deodorant, and then looked at my bed and got back in
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
Randomize