is it considered a "problem" when you find a pickle slice in your bed in the morning or is it like a "super-awesome bonus"?
Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
i decided i am going on the Justin Bobby plan for success. Don't cut my hair for a year, don't shave for a month, land Audrina Patridge. Game on.
: am i supposed to send the mass text 'merry christmas!' to my booty calls too?
Tell me why I'm at Target and this entire Spanish family is crowding around the condoms questioning which ones they should get
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
He kept stopping sex to whisper in my ear, and the only thing I could understand was "double stuffed oreos"
Brightest idea yet: lets drink enough at ladies-drink-free nights to make up for the cost of tampons. Breaking even on having vaginas!
Hahahaha don't tempt me. Remember we're trying to avoid airport jail if possible
ill dress up as a sperm donor and you can go as the cup....
I don't think meeting his drug dealers counts as a relationship landmark.
So the 25yr old smokeshow I fucked last night said "Prepare to be disappointed" as he put the condom on. I was. 40 is bullshit.
I get dinner and bf perks from the one guy. But dick with no commitment from the other. I’m living my best life.
You drank whiskey for 9 hours and did not eat anything.Nothing good was going to come from that.
Randomize
