I'm eating my dinosaur chicken nuggets in the order they would die in the food chain.
I went to his work to give him some blankets and ended up blowing him in the bathroom. See what happens when you don't come over?
Why do my balls have what looks like rust on them?
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
You know whats not fun? Making yourself throw up on a sand dune at 4 in the morning.
So someone just pointed out to me that during dinner, I mentioned more women that I'm attracted to than men. The transition might be complete. I'm gay.
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
I'm not trying to be dramatic but if someone makes you choose between getting a Brazilian or dying. For the sake of your sanity just fucking die
She crossed her eyes and threw up into a glass while sitting at the bar. It was fifty shades of sketchy dude.
Han Solo would be ashamed of me.
His mom walking in on us having sex was probably the highlight of the night
Woke up with a $50 attached to my penis with a rubber band..
Sweet. Tell little Richard to buy us a sack and a pizza.
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
i do my most serious thinking while screwing her. ive pondered everything from quantum physics to the life cycle of a badger. if i keep this up ill have a phd in no time.
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