So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
did the hipsters beat you up because you are more ironic than they are?
Boys can't fool me. I know "want to come up and meet my dogs?" is just a nondirect way of saying "come up and meet my penis".
Just ducktaped my beer to my bike. See you in ten.
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
I totally just stopped for a booty call on the way to my parents for easter....good friday is an understatement
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
i introduced myself to everyone by my new name, thundergooch. i threatened the neighbors with a hammer when they used my real name. needless to say, sailor jerry was not kind to me.
Licking pop rocks off a stranger's washboard abs and kissing strangers young enough to be my kid. Yeah, it was THAT kind of party last night
I was gonna buy a KIA, but then I remembered how awesome the sex was in the back of a Hyundai so I went with that.
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
What does it mean when the government shuts down and your boyfriends wife wants a divorce ON YOUR BIRTHDAY?
She's throwing a party for a guy that just got out of rehab?
Are you coming over for scrambled eggs and hand jobs?
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