You're so nebulous sometimes
its like the voldemort of pregnancies, we don't talk about it
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
I learned something last night. Strippers can be on house arrest?
pretty sure 5 days for a bachelor party in Vegas is too long when even the stripper giving me a lapdance says "wow that's a long time!"
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
Part of my treatment is getting high and having sex with 22 year olds. I have a prescription!
GETTING HORNY AT RANDOM IS REALLY FUCKING INCONSIDERATE.
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
Hypothetically speaking how does one remove a lamp that they hypothetically superglued to the ceiling?
Acetone nail polish remover, and you lied about studying last night didn't you?
Oh definitely.
He apologized for cumming on my leg, but not for ghosting me for 3 weeks before :(
I told you naked hot tub wrestling would turn bad now one of us has a gash on the head and another a black eye
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
Side piece definitely knows about my GF. Said it was sexy when I go commando, then left me pantsless in the club bathroom
Randomize
