You work out of a Hotel?
there's nothing like that first "just failed out of my program" beer
Haha im sorry. Its just financially responsiable to bang him instead of you right now.
For the record it's 1026 and you told me I could leave you in the bathroom.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was trying to be really smart and save 10 dollars for each cab there and back. ...so I ripped a $20 dollar bill in half.
It's a long way off yet but I've started planning my eviction party. Be prepared, it includes jungle juice.
2 things. 1. I just gave her a 6 hour long marathon fucking for America. 2. Thought of a new invention halfway through, and it's flawless.
She's popping painkillers like they're tic tacs and singing the soundtrack to dreamgirls. It's you're turn to babysit her.
Omg. The nephews found my stripper pole. The scary part is theyre good at it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was woken up in my old house by the new residents ... I don't even have a Key anymore
Oh Julie took your pants off last night, I put your pajama bottoms on, and Rachel took your bra off. It takes a village.
I'm curious as to what my outfit choices drunk me made for this weekend.
dollar rum and cokes, see you on the dark side of infinity
I wasn't going to drink. Then there was alcohol so I gave that up.
I could be writing so much lesbian porn right now but noooooo!
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