He's been sleeping iwht ***
Nooo
Yeah I don't even know how, she looks like her mom smoked crack while she was in the womb
And then hit her in the face with a shovel
"you've got the devil in yuh. the curse of Jesus is coming on your sex soon." That's what a homeless guy just told me.
I'll have you know...trying to masturbate while a song about jesus is stuck in your head is next to impossible
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
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No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
My male hookup buddy is gonna meet my female hookup buddy, let the awkward hookup games begin!
The difference between you and me last night was that I didn't remember getting into the cab and you didnt know we were in one.
I want to break up with him.....but he has a george forman grill...like I need that
My mom got me high and then dropped me off at a church.
I've abandoned trying to find a logical explanation of your life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sitting at dinner with my family looking over sexts. The thirst is far too real. They're talking about retail and I'm like haha, yes, you are all correct.
I puked into my skirt and then had to carry it to the bathroom and dump it out, Lmfao and it was like 2pm
Remind me to tell you all about the topless girl on the street who attempted to taze me.
I don't even think NICOLE made a fool of herself last night...
your aware she lit herself on fire, right?
I ate all your munchie Mac and Cheese cause you left me on the lawn. If you don't want it to happen gain, drag my drunk ass inside next time
Car sex in a public place. Boo ya.
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