Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
That's when you crack a 10am beer
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
also. he gave me a foot massage during 69ing when i got a cramp. he's a winner.
i dont care if it was her birthday. if she leaves me with a half rack of budweiser and her boyfriend obviously shits gonna go down.
at the last minute we also decided to throw an egg in the beer bong. and he drank it, shell and all.
The chips are stabbing my teeth, and I can feel the muscle under my mouth contracting.
They tried to convince me I broke Alex's nose. Also they stranded me on the roof.
That's what they get for locking a drunk laxer in Mitch's car.
he kept telling me how much his girlfriend would love me while we were making. why does tequila always do this to me?
You know, having a conversation evolve from attractive men to roommate orgies would be weird with anyone else, but you get me.
I can't tell if this is a hangover or just a perfect combination of shame and regret
Drunk sperm are not productive sperm.
Who am I kidding? With my track record, I'm going to end up sleeping at the strip club with just nipple tassels on.
that is our friendship pylon, do not lose it
fuck you.
DO NOT LOSE IT
the girls would appreciate it if you invited over some drunk, single, straight men with low standards.
Randomize
