Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
Instead of peeing my cute lil blue panties I peed in the train parking lot in front of an asian.
birth control should be required to get into college
there r dinosaurs outside my house i hear them
pretty sure those are just snow plows....go back to bed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Pillow talk just revealed that he originally thought I was 16.
Woke up to pictures of me cooking wings with a blow torch.
Green mimosas i think yes
Apparently we were arguing for captain seats so I shouted "who has your virginity." I got the seat.
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I would like you to know I am eating your apology chocolate, which means i forgive you for puking everywhere before formal
He asked if I had feelings for him while I was lying naked on the floor vomiting into a trashcan as he held my hair and fed me Pringles.
Should probably stop going into the gas station to look for the most normal person to hitch a ride with to drive me to a party
He made me a flamingo drink and now I don't know why things are the way they are.
Sometimes a man just deserves to get woken up with a blowjob.
I'll text you tomorrow when I'm not in someone's torture cave if I don't by noon call for help.
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