Hahaha figures, hmm should I spank you? Or throw a cow at you?
Sorry I never got back to you. I got high. I know it sounds like a commercial or something... but its true
I made a mac n' cheesicle. Better in my head than in real life. Gonna keep smoking to see if it gets better.
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
Just got physical proof that at 6 am i was running around with raw potatoes threatening to mash them on his floor. Hello, Mobile uploads
There was a reason that "Throat Warrior 2011" was written on my martini glass. He said my title was undisputed.
Hey, 'thunder cock' as proud as I am for you getting laid, could you put a muzzle on her? I have to be up at 5, thanks.
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
I gave a very stressed out cashier a mini bottle from my purse the day after Christmas. It's what Jesus would have done.
You're a good person. Sharing is caring.
I woke up with what appeared to be LSD in my pocket. Know anything about this?
By far the fardest thing to do drunk is open a band aid
I don't know if I'm more disturbed by the fact that you hooked up with a dude with one arm, or that "hook up with a dude with one arm" was on your bucket list.
We get up to three toppings. Dignity is not one of them.
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
That guy u hooked me up with kept calling me james while were doing it...
Randomize
