thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
...She just said, "We've been blessed with good drugs lately."
she's sitting here naked with heels and a taco.
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
If I could drive and get you Starbucks I would... But that's probably not a good idea. On account of the drugs.
There was just a girl standing next to me on the train, wasted, wearing only one shoe. I so wanted to pat her on the shoulder and say "oh honey, we've all been there"
We need a fire pit. Meat. And a keg.I mean like a cow we just carve from. And cook it. We can use the milk from the udder to make White Russians
Dude I'm driving around California right now hiding little bags of weed in random places like Easter eggs so that I can come back and find them later
I used my dress as a plate for pizza rolls last night
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
Ick. That's not even the fun kind of punishment.
I said I wanted pizza tattoo on my ass and the tattooist asked me what I wanted on it.
my night went from a boring school play to hotboxing a car with 3 criminals
I don’t know what language he speaks but I know my boobs will translate just fine
I’m looking forward to few days of international relations
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