Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
Im interpreting your silence as a silent plea for me to come wake you up. See you soon.
He just kept muttering to himself "stabby stabby stabby stabby" while we were boning. I will never be boning him again.
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
apparently i'm the only person who has heard from her since saturday. she texted me "burt reynolds" at 2am sunday
I am listening to lecture and I can hear us in the background talking about anal beads.
Dude you were sitting on a bench on the street with her for 45 minutes thinking you were on the bus
I would watch the shit out of some full house right now.
It's ok, I may have just peed outside your car and used your whataburger napkins. Hope you weren't saving them for a special occasion.
my vagina can't take this anxiety. there is no way he is 19 and this smooth. he's lying about his age or he's a goddamn sexual prodigy
Thanks for the viagra you gave me last night. I ended up getting called in to work to cover a shift. So I had to tell Kayla that I couldn't hang out and I had to try and hide my dick all night while walking serving people food all night.
I just had to take my laptop away from him because he was on Amazon and had 20 Seahawks garden gnomes in his cart.
My doctor wrote down abstinence as my form of birth control. #ihavenodatinglife
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
Last night i walked into a gas station to get condoms. I threw them on the counter and the guy gave me a funny look because i was wearing a bra under an open cardigan and no shoes. I screamed "DONT JUDGE ME!" and he gave them to me for free.
Randomize
