just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
Came home to a chalk baord that read:" Think like a rapist." Can't say I'm surpirsed.
I had a fork in my beer hand and just stabbed my tongue.
I am so high I am beginning to unironically like Vanessa Carlton.
For the amount I put out, I should be going on way more dates.
...that's why he's not doing anything with his life except breeding geckos
i had to wake up at 4 am to do my laundry because I was afraid if I saw people in the laundry room they would judge me by the amount of clothes I had covered in vomit from syllabus week
I apparently insisted on hugging all the bushes and apologizing for pollution on the way home.
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
Riding the train home at 6 am for class still drunk is losing its novelty in my junior year
Because 9 pm Thursday you drink a loco cause you just wanna get drunk and have a good time with your friends. Then you wake up on Tuesday and you've had 17 locos and you're pregnant, lying on the side of the road, 3 states over. THAT'S why we don't have only locos parties.
So hungover and decided to eat a burrito and a pot brownie for dinner, this is what adulthood looks like.
dude i told her that I loved her...and she said, " go fuck yourself"
My EX’s roommate heard about the breakup and offered to help me bang it out. I think she hates her even more than I do.
"I'm 22, I could die in a piano bar." -a sentence i actually just said to my boss
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