but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
I blacked out the second time 3am rolled around. My brain was taking a beating trying to do that math.
Don't worry I drank 7 more beers & brought home a guy that bit me at the bar.
we've got reservations. ask for the eat a bag of dicks table
I have six drafts of messages to you that just say "blood" and I have no idea where they came from.
Got a blowie from her in the cab on the way home. Made awkward eye contact with the cabbie who said, and I quote "Keep the mess in her mouth bro", I did so only out of respect
Watched him slip somethin into her drink. Dragged him of his bar stool, punched him out, and told her what i saw. Bartender used some chemical to confirm presence of rophynol. Just woke up at her place
Euphemism? No, "pantsless vodka yoga" is a legitimate pastime of mine
I'm laying in bed with a case of beer,.. That's how this break up is going..
No gay bar. My eyemake up looks like sex and Im using these dick daggers of mine tonight.
We went rollerblading down high street singing "Free Falling"in ketchup and mustard costumes. A car full of guys drove by and yelled out their window "Need a hot dog with that?!" Naturally, we woke up at their apartment.
I cannot be with a girl who won't let me come home on my lunch break, eat spicy ranch and watch Breaking Bad without pants on. #lesbianproblems
Sorry, I didn't know he was with you. The ongoing collapse of Trump has me horny as hell.
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