No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.
Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
Fuck winter. I had to scrape my windshield, shoeless, after the walk of shame so I could go home.
We really need to check into harvesting part of our liver now
Let's cut to the chase. What days are we sleeping together this week?
I'll make a Jello mold of your face so everyone can get drunk off your face
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
dude you said you were going to be a human flag and climbed the telephone pole and fell in front of a car
That's the best thing about having gay dads, you don't gotta do shit on mothers da and everybody is down wit getting wasted on mimosas at brunch
The last thing I remember was riding in a grocery cart with two strangers while a cop pushed us
The perfect man would keep a whisky sour in my hand and give me endless sex. I really don't think that's too much to ask for.
I think clothing becomes optional at the second date! But you seem like a rule breaker
Trust me, I'm a professional lesbian.
Do the security cameras outside your house capture sound? If so your whole family is going to hear me describe my threesome
Randomize
