Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
I'm sorry I didn't make it out, I got distracted by sparkley boobies.
Peed in a church parking lot last night. As if Jesus didnt hate me enough already.
Excused from finishing the term project because my lab partner got arrested. For the second year in a row. Public school, I love you.
you came home soaking wet, and when I asked where your umbrella was, you pulled it out of your bag and were so proud you kept it dry.
I made him breakfast and we cuddled on the couch watching march of the penguins, which is, in case you were unaware, the opposite of fucking on a pool table
I accidentally walked in the wrong house but I somehow left with a chicken leg. Good fucking night.
You're invited to our X-games themed party. We have an ice luge and every time someone eats shit we drink. It's gonna be great.
I'm just gonna use that pot butter as dip for chips. That's fat, American AND stoner!
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
If you can't have hot, loud sex in a dorm for the last time ever, what can you do in this world?
Sometimes intelligent conversation doesn't mix well with a romantic interest. It's possible the two are best kept separate. Toys should just stay in the toy box.
WHY IS SHE PANDERING YOU, A SIMPLE GOBLIN, TINY WEENER PICTURES OVER STATE LINES
Randomize
