is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
We need to get cat food
Nevermind, the cat will eat lucky charms
After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
I was pretty stoned. I thought I needed a seatbelt at the restaurant.
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
you kept saying 'its nothing a six pack wont fix' as they loaded you into the ambulance.
Drinking with mariachis at jimmy johns.
nothing like a walk of shame in front of a cnn news crew to start the morning off right
Please tell me that is you having sex in my car in my driveway and not a complete stranger.
Opted for cash back rather than the 10% extra I'd get for store credit, solely for drinks tonight.
You're lovely.
Lesson learned. Don't roleplay with a real knife.
Just ate an entire BBQ chicken pizza this better go to my tits
He? As in you personified your dick?
Granted every 20 shifts of working there you seem to be on par to receive some sort of racy satisfying sexual encounter which money can’t buy
Randomize
