bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
Can you please check on Jay? He just called and left a Backstreet Boys song on my voicemail. Either it's 1998, or someone needs to go back to rehab.
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
get home. someone threw up in the fishtank last night.
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
Ok I won't set anything on fire if you wear pants all night. This is a bet we're both destined to lose.
look for us when you get to the club. we're the guys wearing snorkels.
I just found a piece of glass in my ear from Saturday.
You paid at the door and they gave you a straw for the kiddie pool full of booze.
After a bit there were two girls who got naked and liquor wrestled. I don't think it was planned.
I walked in on him jerking it to videos of UFC fighters. The most awkward part: he didn't stop when I walked in.
It must be love. I'm deleting my porn for him.
That cat I follow on Facebook beat cancer so we're drinking tonight in celebration
He motorboated me, gave me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
i opened the door and you were passed out on my doorstep wearing ugly shorts and cuddling a pinnapple, i dont know what happened to you.
Currently standing at the bus stop in just a pillowcase and its fucking snowing
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