there is a puppy in the bar... no really i didnt steal this one
He started yelling "we're making a baby" mid thrust.. probably not the right guy for me right?
I think my tv knows when im high and tells taco bell
cant help it. i get a boner every time that shake weight infomercial comes on
Another night, another sound of my neighbor almost having an orgasm.
And she used to have such long ones. Sad.
He got 20 stiches.. Who knew so much damage could come from a single shopping cart.
fat people need to stop using the handicapped bathroom stall so I can have sex in it. it's common logic
Its everclear night, yall need carbs in your body!
no, she just came home, mumbled about being a gerbil out of water then ate half cooked chicken nuggets.. normal night
She was wearing some slutty variation of a toga and giving the entire bus a pep talk on why we should black out tonight...I'M IN LOVE AND I DON'T CARE WHO KNOWS IT!
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
So... crashing at the hot bartender's place is not a solid marital decision.
Worse. He's Mormon. At least a gay guy will go get drinks with me.
Yes. I'm realizing that sports games are good reasons to drink. I just cheer when everyone else cheers.
We're so high we're eating flavored lube.
Randomize
