one two three fourrrrnication!
Whenever I'm sad I just imagine if babies were born with mustaches...
He ripped my extensions out during sex, not noticing until this morning when he saw them on the floor. I told him they werent mine and he went and threw them in his sister's room.
My mom just informed me that my dog licks their toes while her and my dad are having sex. I'm apartment searching.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wonder sometimes what your vagina thinks about you.
it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
You handed some guy a spoon you found, he yelled SPOON GAME, and then the two of you spent the next 20 minutes throwing spoons all over the kitchen.
he was cradling you in his arms feeding you rum straight from the bottle and you kept sucking his fingers.
I'm mumbling to people and trying not to accidentally shit my pants
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was handing out home-made business cards that read "finger slamming bitches since 1986"\n
He should be castrated
Nah he might accidentally come while they're cutting it off. Wouldn't be fair to the surgeons
"YOU A2TE UNDERAGE LOL" Got that at 2am. Gotta stop dating alcoholics.
Chipotle farts are not good for seducing boys.
Truth be told it's significantly easier to get over someone when they file a police report on you
what do you mean he's functionally heterosexual
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