You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
anal on a first date. tsk tsk.
It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just used my 7th grade year book to figure out who I hooked up with last night. Being home is magical.
my Econ professor just passed around his phone for us to take a pic of ourselves so he could learn our names. I am currently looking him up on my sex offenders app.
tailgaiting my last final, a perfect sendoff.
i probably shouldve stopped when i uncurled the curly straw in my cocktail because it was slowing me down
It's like the last supper of drinking before the summer ends
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He corrected my use of grammar... I think we both know that means i have to sleep with him
Why am I feeling up grandma?!
I'm really glad a picture of you as an infant followed this text.
Yuck. My throat feels like someone chucked a couple of Maltov cocktails down it and finished it off with a super soaker filled with Jameson.
Not yoga, whiskey. Totally mis-typed whiskey.
Every time I'm hungover I just want to watch Harry Potter and cry.
Hey, if a dude can't randomly belt out Whitney Houston tunes from time to time, is life really worth living??
Randomize