bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
So my mouth tastes like dick. Does that explain how our talk went?
just opened a can of spagetti o's with a butter knife. the things u will do for food when ur stoned.
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
You should seriously consider super glueing your knees together
The power of my vagina can withstand any attempt of celibacy
Im done having sex . he ruined it for me after he said " can we use my penis as a shovel ?"
Jake and I will do a protection ritual for ur dick I don't know where she has been
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
I can get stoned and we can bake and then I can eat 70% of it and it will be awesome
Back at condo with chick. What is the condom situation urgent response needed
He literally lured me in the house with his cat then we ended up fucking on the living room couch while the cat just sat there and watched
I'm sorry for breaking our door. And being a bitch about it.
It's barely past noon, how am I already talking about double penetration
Be there in 20. Want icecream?
sex. I want sex. I like where your heads at though.
I went to steal condoms from your room and all I could find was chik fil a sauce
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