Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
I just threw up during my phone interview for the largest PR firm in the world.
Accidentally just signed something at work 'lotus flower' I need to keep my stripper life separate from real life.
that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The bartender cut me off so I peed in the corner. How no one noticed I have no idea.
Alas, very true. I'll sell some of my eggs and give you like 10%
And with my 90% I'll get a scooter with a sidecar. And a pony. Also with sidecar.
Bathtub guy came to. He helped me roll the fat chick away from the fridge. Shower and breakfast are on. You're plan failed!
I've officially done it all, fucked a girl wearing a twister board. ABC parties are amazing!
So I ripped my crotchless fishnet body suit when my drunk ass tried to crawl through the crotch to put it on.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
On a scale of one to liver failure, how bad would it be if I played thunderstruck alone?
All I remember is laying in that secret hideaway closet, naked, with a beer cowboy hat on and you walking in and sitting down crying because no one would have sex with you
Whenever I'm hungover I try to stay in public as much as possible, hoping to be a cautionary tale to children. It's a public service, really.
I know it was a good night because I got a lecture from my roommates mom about stranger danger
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
she peed her pants, took them off, the put them back on. but she only put her legs in one hole.
Randomize