Taylor Swift is so right about you.
I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
We just used hot candle wax from our joint lighting candle to make a bunch of new small ones how stoned are we
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
After the Patriots lost I punched him in the face. But I still feel like that isn't a good reason to dump me.
Lest we forget our veterans. Also that two years ago I lost my virginity on this day in a hot tub. Go me for being the worst person on earth.
You are a piece of meat with a side of awesome to me.
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
Hooked up with a guy resembling a bearded Cher. I need the lenses on my beer goggles fixed. Pronto.
Hah I guess I sent that to like ten people, along with another one of me sitting in a bath tub eating an ice cream sandwich.
Woke up behind one of the fraternity brothers houses in the grass wearing a guinness hat and aviators hugging a 30 rack box with a zonie on my chest next to a campfire.
So, I'm a little drunk in Seattle with Glenna, but we've all agreed that it's patriotic to think about Bill Clinton from time to time during sex. 'Merica
I'm abstinent now
Oh, is this one of the times when you're serious?
Im watching animal planet drunk, watching a documentary on mermaids. Tonight has not gone to waste.
Him showing up yesterday was like a giant ego stroke for my vagina.
Randomize
