Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
That's when you crack a 10am beer
i pretty much saved your life. you were so conviced that your nail polish remover bottle was "Vodka Lemon"
which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My mom can no longer prohibit me from smoking pot..I sell to her boyfriend.
i officially have more pictures of his dick than pictures of us together
moving back to school this early was a terrible idea we already used up our bail fund
My roommate didn't flush after her miscarriage. Time to drink myself blind. I need you for moral support. Or so I don't have to drunkenly cry alone anymore. Whatever, help.
Holy shit, you lost your virginity on 11/11/11. Now every time someone fucks you, they can make a wish. Your vagina has officially been transformed into a wishing well.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Now I'm heckling that my belch is more exciting than their fireworks and I peed down the driveway.
I think she finds the idea of a naked fat man lying on the table and holding our butter offensive
Well I mean he is in a slightly seductive pose
I literally was just rolling on the ground and said to her 'this is what dying looks like'
Surprise court date day!!! Wake the fuck up!
My stuff that was at your place last night smells like doughnuts. I'm not even mad.
Should I wear my "kiss me I'm highrish" shirt for my drug screen today?
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