I woke up with my face in a pile of pancakes and 3000 mistakes.
ugh, i have officially sinned in all of my cute clothes. i can't even wear any of them without feeling regret.
I wasn't fucked. I was just drunk, because i was still able to walk into the woods and masterbate.
tonight, alcohol would be proud of us
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So the next morning, she had to tell her kids we were moving furniture around all night.
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
I just want to make mistakes. Like stds that go away with antibiotics mistakes.
I think the name vodka for a girl is amazing
she broke my one feeling. seriously I think she broke my dick.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's tweaking out . If he's on fucking bathsalts and eats my face like a chalupa pull the plug. I don't want to live with no fucking face. Pull. The. Plug.
There was a pumpkin carving contest and we carved a very realistic dick about to penetrate a vagina. Our Christian Youth hosts were not happy.
Came out of blackout state to the curtains torn down & the headboard laid on top of him. & yes he was still breathing
So I don't think the seahorse breeding thing is gonna work.
That was random, even for you Mom.
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
Randomize