omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
I have demons in me.
you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
I just saw a man vacuming his front lawn. What is this world coming to?
Going to get yelled at but I labeled the reel "four dried up sluts decide going to the middle east to shop during a war is the best idea ever"
I think it is impossible 2 take a person seriously when their last name is Pancake
Im about to have a threesome, Ill pay you twenty bucks to go clean my room. Just throw it all in the closet.
I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
Just talked to Laura, confirming that is my bra. Hope it goes well with the rest of your wall decorations.
your fridge is broken, your sock drawer is full of snow, and you flipped off the whole stadium on the big screen. I'd say it went well.
There must be a happy medium universe where you get it on with my girlfriend enough to cause me pain but not a full on cardiac arrest. It's a fine line to tread though.
Nope we are at the ER my brothers crazyass neighbor kinda stabbed him in the neck. He's gonna be fine.
Made eye contact with his twin sister the day after he gave me a lifechanging blowjob. Do you think she knows?
What if for Halloween I paint my self gold and make sandwiches for everyone? I'd be a trophy wife! Get it?
Randomize
