I'll start drinking again when I know where I am
finally cleaned my dorm for the first time all year. bleach is awesome.
Our dealer is pledging my frat. When he come to sell me weed I make him take out the garbage.
So can we talk about how we all three made out with the bike taxi driver in lieu of paying him. I'm not even mad, that's resourceful. You know what married girls would have had to do? They'd have had to pay.
PS August 29 of last year was when you ran over my foot. Facebook just reminded me.
Bombed my 8 a.m. exam and the liquor store doesn't open till noon. Drinking unfinished beers from last night till they open.
I'm just sad for you. It sucks that the 17 douchebag asshole guys you're fucking can't morph into one nice, normal, non-alcoholic guy that has a drivers license and no criminal history.
Im gunna just be that one ballerina in the low V leopard thong leotard and everyone else can be boring and prude with their little pink tights on.
Just resonded to a booty call with "how much effort is required on my part?" I think I've finally reached the point of smoking too much pot
I'm eating Swedish fish out of my boobs and watching SOA.. There is no way your Tuesday night will be better than mine.
Just come home. We will have sex and Taco Bell. I'm feeling wild, I put on temporary tattoos.
Thought the acid was fake. Then my reflection didn't move when I did in the bathroom.
thats all i want out of life, to get high and watch weiner dog races
My professor just told my lab he could drive us around town in his 1991 Lincoln towncar limo for our bar crawl. This just keeps getting better!
I'm keeping him.
Sex was good?
I had to tap out three times. There aren't words for how much better than "good" that is.
Randomize
