Yeah I guess I was Pocahontus. If she were a trifling drunk who hung out in her undies, with possible brain damage.
as evidence of my kitchen this morning my night involved alot of mustard and condoms
I think the recipie for awesome sauce is butter and semen
i guess i called my mom last night. she wasnt nearly as impressed with what we did in the bathroom as i was
she was home schooled till college. were she learned how to give the most amazing blowjobs is still a mystery.
We woke up, fucked, and shared a piece of my sister's first communion cake for breakfast.
And you thought you were going to hell last weekend.
There comes a time in a man's life when he's almost thirty he just needs to stop watching Degrassi. This is that time.
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
thanks for being my moral compass. and thanks for not always pointing north so i can be slutty and not feel bad about it.
I feel my soul being ripped out of my eye sockets
Hey where the fuck is the rest of my beer? Lets start this day off right
Not much, just taking another sorting hat quiz while waiting for this porno to finish buffering
had a dream you helped me fill my shoes with yogurt. we were even like "why didn't we think of this before?!" like it was just so obvious
that sounds like something we'd do... we're onto something here
I woke up with a black eye and a buttplug...not sure I really want to know what happened.
Randomize
