it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
Just wana tell you im wearing assless jorts tonight. Ive been waiting my whole life for this.
On a lighter note, my mom and I were playing scattergories, and for "things that you keep hidden" we both put dildo. Proof that we really are related.
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
my dad pointed to my full beer and said drink up we're leaving now.
can you adopt me?
Look, if I'm too lazy to put any effort into sexting, you better believe I'm too lazy to put any effort into dating.
Nothing like coaching 5 year olds with a bunch of visible bruises from last night's drunk bondage sex.
I just need some dick and some jimmy johns
So apparently I twerked on my coworkers last night. One month at the new job n I guess this is how I'm getting to know people
Happy Father's Day to the first man I called Daddy while cumming.
I never thought my gollum impression would lead to me getting laid.
Huzzah!
wait. i have to tell u something. and it has nothing to do with dildos or spiders
I'll text you when I have a mental breakdown about it.
Please do.
I blame her lesbian super powers of coercion.
Randomize
