Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
i left him drunk and in the fetal postion in the shower.
was the water running?
yeah but he said he knows how to swim
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Whoever had sex in my bed during the party last night left a glow in the dark condom on my floor. I'm not even mad anymore, I just want to know who it is so they can tell me where to get one.
The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
It was just like old times except for going to hangover throw up before waking my parents up to open presents. Merry Christmas!
I cooked you Mac and cheese when I was drunk and drugged. That counts for about 4 meals. Try harder
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Got high with dad and hunted squirrels in the basement. Is this seriously what my life has come to?
You called my nipples compassionate. What does that even mean?
literally just blacked in. Im watching what to expect when your expecting, eating pretzels and peanut butter, and I have someone's underwear around my neck.
Wouldn't life be so much easier if you could just walk up to attractive men and say, "Let me bear your children" and it wouldn't be creepy?
Or possibly end in a restraining order?
I lick assholes and I wouldn't eat mdma
Who the abstract fuck do you think you are!?
Randomize