My hand turned me down
My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.
DUUUDE!! just found out that the fbi has a kids page. guess who's got a new jumior officer printout badge?
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to.
What can I say, he stumbled upon the key to my heart: orgasms and mac 'n cheese.
and then the entire party sang the national anthem a capella around the keg.
I don't know if I have the sustained energy level for partying hard
Not a choice. You are mistaking my comments as options. My statements are facts. This is what is happening.
the potatoes in the margarita machine wasn't the breaking point. its when he turned on the stove and put a bunch of bottle rockets on it that i knew the night had prematurely failed
Just read 119 best sex positions. I wanna try 107 of them. Can I put you down for 50?
We just don't discuss our relationships. It's pretty much like we're single no matter what to each other. And I'm okay with that. ¯\\(ツ)/¯
I hate how she's getting mean with age
Meh, you can't hate. That's our basic life goal and you know it.
Nothing like a little chlamydia diagnosis to ring in the new year
I think my moral compass just broke
Randomize
