she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
Do you think if Santa was real that he's have a big penis?
Thats my favorite, when ex girlfriends become XL ex girlfriends
He took a banana and in front of everyone showed her how he wanted it done.
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
Drinking ketchup directly out of the bottle does not make it tomato juice.
The bed I'm sleeping in has a headboard only handcuffs could love. I'm gonna pick up a local dude and wreck that.
The night went downhill when he lit her purse on fire and tried putting it out with vodka
Boobs are also good for catching the vodka gummy bears that miss my mouth
She just shoved like three McNuggets in her mouth and started sobbing and I have no idea what's going on.
Rage-masturbating and then crying myself to sleep. Welcome to Wednesday.
My cat licked the coke mirror and now is giving me dirty looks. Bet money she has the drip.
Who the fuck just called me and played funkytown
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
Is there a way to use porn to inspire him to have dirty thoughts? Like the movie Inception except with more lube and orgams?
Randomize
