Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
I had it in my eyebrows, my bangs, under one eye, and across both cheeks. Congratulations on the successful and elusive warpaint cumshot.
there is no 'pace myself' on the blackout express
Just walked in on my older brother getting a bj. He told the girl to "keep going" and then attempted to high five me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm also 95% sure I had a conversation with someone on how hard it would be to jerk off with out opposable thumbs
Can we have a celebratory fuck now that the lockout is over?
You're the best girlfriend ever.
I drank butter last night, who am I to judge?
A man bought two 40's from me, then asked if I had duct tape. How do people over 50 know about Edward 40hands? It was very weird.
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The last two times I had sex with him I forgot who it was half way through
fuck emotions I should've gotten more cats
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
After walking ten blocks barefoot in Boston I've concluded drunk me needs to make better decisions.
I'm so high right now that I winked back at a character in this TV show.
I kept my extra Molly pill in my wallet in the change part, that's also where I keep my body jewelry while I'm working. The nose ring punctured the pill essentially coating itself in MDMA. My nose ring is back in my nose. This could be entertaining
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