Sorry, I have to go home and feed my nepotisms
Sorry, I can't talk, there's a herd of nepotisms headed my way
The pink midgets playing hockey is the EXACT reason cold meds and alcohol do not mix. Period.
If he comes back to you and I'm left alone in lonelytown I'm totally going to poo on your car.
im pretty sure every drug dealer is going to be able to retire the day after alice in wonderland comes out
Someone said we're out of ice. You collapsed on the spot and started sobbing, saying 'but where will all the polar bears live". That drunk.
I wonder if she thought to herself "I'm gonna sleep with that guy tonight" when she watched me puke on the bar at 3 in the afternoon?
The twins are whispering in turkish together. I think I did something bad last night.
he's gonorrhea incarnate
I can't believe he let me cut his hair as stoned as I was.. I think I even cut my own hair too
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
We kind of crashed their funeral party. Oops.
I have to sleep with him. We're too much alike. It's like clash of the titans, except instead of clashing, he's putting it in me.
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
Good thing he's hot and my vagina likes him or I'd be at Dennys right now.
Randomize
