I have the worst wedgie. Seriously. Its horible. And there are people everywhere around me.
Slide your hand down the back of your pants and shift to the side slowly
...are you coming on to me?
I left my toothbrush at her house. This is getting way too serious for me.
You're on Grindr at the STD clinic. I love you.
Sleeping with random people is the same as soul searching, right? Ps that wasn't a team name suggestion.
The last thing I remember was riding in a grocery cart with two strangers while a cop pushed us
You don't even know. The entire marching band thinks I'm an alcoholic.
fuck off. It's 10am and I'm drink gin and ginger ale through a twizzler straw. My life is marvellous
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
I made a half way decent playlist
Im gonna call it "hanging myself"
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
finals do horrible things to a person. i haven't worn pants since friday
I figure I since I made out with him that I at least had to save his number in my phone.
I just balanced a full glass of chocolate milk on my left boob. Don't think i've ever been more proud.
she referred to her cum as “pussy butter” so needless to say we had a good night
No pussy. I don't care what time of year it is you do not look tough wearing sandals. Honestly you look like a high school guidance counselor.
Randomize
