You told me alcohol would be the death of you then ordered 10 shots of tequila.
The stripper told me she had been working there for eight years, then got mad when I asked if she was trying to make it into mangment. Awkwardest lap dance
Made it home ok. Only got hit by one car.
Woke up naked on my floor covered in cookies. We should celebrate fake hurricanes every weekend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so far I've only met her once and hung out one other time. Up to 5 BJs already. That's serious efficiency.
There's a picture of you on facebook laying in the street with 3 cops standing over you after you faceplanted off that guy's shoulders.
Is that what happened to my face?!
I just got my beard fondled by a drunk chick outside the venue. I feel slightly violated. And I think her boyfriend wanted to fight me.
LET US USE OUR GENITALS TO CELEBRATE THIS VICTORY
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
People are talking politics and I have had 9 mimosas
Imma do four shots of whisky within two minutes and pass out. Otherwise this'll go badly.
I bet you there is porn for people who get off on someone rubbing Chipotle on themselves
You were supposed to catch herpes, not feelings!!!
I remember being like "I can't hold both of you guy's hair back!" so I put headbands on each of you
Randomize