So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
I may have been to starbucks and 2 classes with balls still written on my face...
I've been deciding between brands of bagels for 20 minutes. This why I doint smoke weed.
There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
Somewhere at this very moment, a group of drunk white girls are singing dont stop believing.
Walk of Shame today included voting.
I think I need to donate blood to see if I have Hepatitis. Again.
we shared soup. that is literally the extent of my romantic life right now
I think I'm going to add the date I dumped his sorry ass as a life event on FB.
I think that's justified.
I just did the walk of shame in monkey slippers in the snow
Teach me the song of your people
This wouldn't be the first time my boss has seen me topless
His exact words: "I don't have anything you can't treat with antibiotics."
Was I trying to make a threesome happen again?!
Yep
I need to stop doing that, Im gonna get punched in the face
whatever. i just wanna get "forget my own name" wasted
no. you need to know your name so people know where to return you when you get lost.
Randomize
