being a part time student has turned me into a full time alcoholic.
We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
i believe i can now do shots of gasoline with no chaser. its been that kind of summer.
The amount of pregnancy tests I've taken in my life is unhealthy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Exactly how does jacking off in my purse count as a 'early christmas present'?
I recorded his orgasm, set it as his ringtone, and called him while they were singing happy birthday to his mom. Yeah, revenge is sweet.
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
I'm gonna make some noodles and go to bed. Hopefully I don't fall into the stove or something.
I saw that you sent me a photo and the first thing out of my mouth was "I swear if it's another photo of a dick poking out of a bubble bath"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
I was not drunk. There was Star Wars, sex, and baby oil.
He made her leave because she liked Top-Ramen better than Maruchaun. He's my hero.
I'll be an awkward "I've had the grooms penis in my mouth" presence and we can party our nipples off.
will you help me invent vagina-safe pop rocks?
He bought me pizza and bourbon and played scrabble with me. So naturally I slept with him.
Randomize