This is how I know I have no life... Jon and Kate are my emotional roller coaster.
You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
over or under 1pm before my bracket is too blurry to read?
I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
It looks like sephora exploded on his dick, so i assumed I was the second girl that gave him head that night.
The only thing I regret was that he was wearing a scarf when we made out.
When my parents ask if I met any nice guys in California, I'm going to answer, "No, but I have gone home with alot of nice girls". Too much, too soon?
Dude, on the way home the cab driver asked why you didn't bring a guy home and referred to you as "one night stand girl"
So I went tanning and I burned my boobs.
They're like sad pomegranates.
You are talking to me during sexting hours. Be careful, innuendos are taken seriously
You know its an epic night when omar the garbage man gives you a ride home at 6 in the morning.
If he brings home bacon, dont let him leave. Dont screw this one up. this may be our last chance.
Any chance he has an open marriage? That penis shouldn’t be wasted on one woman. It should be shared with all womankind, or at least me. I’m too good at sex to be deprived a penis that large
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize
