dude, i think i am in a porno. I was working out at the hotel gym and some chick was doing yoga and a guy comes up and says "good, now i know your flexible" then they started making out. WTF?
He's the biggest piece of shit to ever exist. He's not even wearing shoes.
not allowed to tweet this cos she's following me but i definitely just got head in a stairwell of the university of chicago. wanted you all to know.
We turned everything surrounding BP and the oil leak into a "that's what she said" drinking game. We've been drunk for a month
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He crawled in my bed this morning, ate me out, and even brought me a panera deli sammie for lunch at school. I don't care what he lied about, all is forgiven him.
What would you do in exchange for having a girl eat a waffle house waffle off your body?
Is this helping you get pumped up or am I going to have to send you more dick pics?
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
MY LIFE IS HARD OK. I HAVE TO WAKE UP AT LIKE 10 OR 11 AFTER SMOKIG POT AND PLAYING FALLOUT UNTIL 3
I took a picture of you last night while you were drunk, trying to smoke a bowl through your nose. It's now your contact id.
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
Thumbs up
I'm too pretty to be this sexually frustrated.
Tonight is an "I'm lonely and single so I'm going to curl up in a warm, melatonin and vodka enriched ball in the corner of my bed with a cat." kind of night.
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