My mom gets in bar fights. She doesn't go to bed early.
k, so I just picked a four leaf clover, then saw my dads penis. Lucky? I think not.
do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
You should probably just propose to him the old fashioned way: sleep with him and get pregnant.
we've been doin it since '07. it's like married sex now, were both comfortable so neither of us really tries anymore, we just do it because it's convenient
Theres a picture of you hanging up on the wall in mcdonalds, i'm impressed
Really?!? Does he think blocking me on FACEBOOK means that he doesn't have a kid with me?!
If is anything like my past relationships, I have no doubt that I will single-handedly reignite the Cold War
i ended up playing naked naked monopoly and hangman with my dealer. i really love my life.
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
Why is there never any toilet paper at his apartment? What does he wipe his ass with? WHAT DOES HE WIPE IT WITH?!?
We celebrated Cinco the right way. We took shots of 1800 then he fucked me while Selena was on TV in the background
This is the third time this month a guy I’m not dating has dumped me. How is this even possible???
Randomize
