I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
Then my mouth guard fell out of the hole, so that's how the dog poop got in my mouth.
I just met the 30 percent of the population with an STD
I think one day, after evolution kicks in, my sons will thank me for having a 3rd ball. That's how much sex I'm having.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
beyond obliterated. i recall legitimately trying to use a ballpoint pen as eyeliner.
please tell me why my pillow is wearing your thong...
...i wondered where i left that...
you have failed as an in class drinking partner.
You told the cop at mobil to keep it real and look both ways before crossing the street.
She is the epitome of a puke & rally. She picked a random hott guy at the bar & made him pinky promise not to leave while she took a power nap. She went & passed out in her friends car & apparently puked just outside the bar. She stumbled in & found the randome guy again & claimed she was golden. Made it to the after party & stayed up til 6 doing body shots off every girl she saw & hooked up with the random from the bar. I love her life
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Care to explain the single rose and the package of "Cowboy Moustaches" I found on the porch?
You came down the stairs dressed as winnie the pooh and kicking cups off the table and out of people's hands
WHY DON'T YOU WANT TO BE MY ESKIMO BRO
I had to dust off the condom box before she came over..
No instead we fucked in the elevator.. it was wrong on so many levels..
How tall was the building? Maybe it was only wrong on some of them
holy f. i broke my toe giving him head. how does that even happen!?
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