If she sees it and stops hooking up w/ me then you owe me
yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
id like to know how you successfully locked me in your backseat last night
Currently doing my walk of shame down a floating dock. No more guys who live on a boat EVER AGAIN
I dunno what he did but it both burns and feels amazing to pee
You better keep a close eye on your uterus tonight cause I am looking good.
Ehhh, contemplating pain killers and fruit snacks if that's any indication.
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
I THINK it was the lead singer. Whoever he was, I have his number and his dick was pierced.
It was totally the lead singer.
why is there a wheelchair in the hall and why does it look like we banged in it?
The only times we have to apologize in this friendship is when you intentionally punch me and that's only happened once so it's okay
The stripper started talking about murdering people....that lapdance turned dark.....
And you seriously thought you could just walk in naked with a bow tied around your penis?
It seemed like a good idea at the time...
Just met my future wife. Please dont fuck her.
Apparently I repeatedly thanked the paramedic for saving the "happy new year" beads i was wearing. that bad.
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