I want you to come here and listen to her climax and then tell me how funny you think it is.
I'm sorry, but the way we fuck, they don't make condoms strong enough not to break
What's a "vodkaffle"?
It's where she puts vodka in the waffle mix.
Pretty sure i didnt get thrown out cause why dont i have more bloody areas
I don't know ur idea of a good first date but I'm pretty sure it shouldn't include him holding my hair while I puke in the street
I forgot not everyone drinks wine out of the bottle. My grandma just asked if i needed a glass with a disappointing look.
It was like the Alcoholic Olympics...double fisting fifths with eight 40s in my backpack...running from the cops in stilettos. I will have bitchin' hamstrings come Monday.
It's like the sisterhood of the traveling vaginas over here
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
say penis size is all related to how funny you are and then tell a feminist joke. if she laughs, you got double points, if she slaps you, she probably wasn't going to sleep with you anyway
there is a video of me on Facebook getting mad at a trash bin what the fuck was in your Pepsi
Or maybe I'll just keep introducing myself like, hello, they call me iane because I need the D. Applications are submitted online, women need not apply.
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
I was so drunk last night I couldn't see faces, only from the shoulders down.
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
Randomize
